Home and Recovering Well!

Those of you who follow me on Facebook or Instagram are likely already aware, but my last update here was from the morning after surgery, so we’re overdue for a post here!

FangFang’s pain remained under control with oral pain meds throughout the day on Wednesday, and we were able to get her Pamidronate infusion that afternoon, so we were discharged from the hospital reasonably early Thursday morning! We so appreciate everyone who is a part of FangFang’s care team in Omaha, but it is so good to get out of the hospital. FangFang is so much more herself, and if I can handle everything she needs at home, this is a much better place for her to continue to heal and recover. We made it home Thursday evening, and it was a huge relief to be back together as a family again.

It’s interesting, though – re-entry is always hard. Or maybe that’s just my family? 😉 I doubt it. Kids are perceptive. FangFang obviously needs extra care and attention after surgery, but my kids who stayed at home had also been away from me for 3 days, and they crave reassurance that they matter, too. Thursday evening was full of not a few meltdowns 🙂 But we made it through!

My mom stayed through Friday, and we had a low key day at home. Honestly, a lot of it looked like this – kids sprawled out on various chairs and couches and on the floor, watching tv.

My aunt and uncle sent some Ni Hao Kai Lan DVDs, and it has been nice to have something new for everyone to enjoy! We have some pretty consistent screen time limits at our house, but the reality is that FangFang currently has 3 limbs immobilized, which makes many activities difficult, if not impossible. We’ve been doing a bit more screen time than usual, and I think that’s entirely appropriate, all things considered.

But we’ve also been easing back into our normal routines. We took 2 weeks off of school while we had family in town for Thanksgiving and then while FangFang and my mom and I went to Omaha for surgery, and it’s always a bit difficult getting back into the groove after a long break. I’ve kept expectations low, and I planned for us to make a truly slow transition, and it’s been going alright 🙂 It takes a lot of work and consistency from me, but we’re getting there!

We’re working with the littles on letters, which they are greatly enjoying!

And the bigs are managing to work some fun into their school days 🙂 Miranda Grace spent some time the other day building with Madeleine CaiQun’s math blocks.

She announced, “This is the story of Vader and how he comes face-to-face with God.” This girl never lacks for creativity 🙂

And for her part, Madeleine CaiQun had some fun making herself into a bean-bag person upstairs.

I’m pleased that we’ve made the transition back to normal life as well as we have. Of course, I’ve been plagued by a cold for over 2 weeks now, and both Miranda and Atticus have been coughing some the last couple days, but I’d hoped everyone else was going to escape the worst of this illness. Miranda has been feeling pretty awful today, though, so I kept her home from swim practice and set her up on the couch for some extra rest and relaxation.

I’m hoping we can make it through the next couple weeks without any more illnesses and we can get a bit more school done before it’s time to disrupt all of our routines again for Christmas!

 

Moving Toward Normal

Matt went back to work last week, so while we’re still settling into life and working toward our new “normal,” this was a big step toward that normal. It was an intimidating one! When we came home with FangFang, going from being home with 3 kids by myself a lot of the time to having both Matt and me home with 4 kids felt pretty manageable; I was not sure that transitioning to a lot of time of me being home with 4 kids by myself was going to be the same!

Honestly, overall, it has gone better than I expected!

The hardest part has been the toddler naps (or lack thereof). Matt had been putting the littles down for their naps, and they’d gotten used to that, apparently to the extent that my presence is now a significantly distracting novelty. Last Monday neither little one napped. Tuesday only one napped. But Wednesday and Thursday both napped, and it was glorious! I could work! There was a break for me in the middle of the day. It was so nice. No naps on Friday. Monday of this week both littles napped (but only after a combined 2 hours or so of effort from me), and Tuesday neither napped. That has been incredibly frustrating – not only do I not get to work or get any calm, quiet time during the afternoon, but I spend 60-90 minutes trying to get the littles to do something they’re not going to do, and that’s time I don’t get to spend doing anything else productive, and they don’t nap anyway. Then we’re all grumpy for the rest of the afternoon. I’m really not ready for them to give up naps – but whether I’m ready for it or not, I’m not sure they’ll keep napping regularly for very long. I need to come up with a different strategy for getting in my work hours, and I think I may need a different nap-encouragement strategy, as well. I’ve gotten some advice, and I’m working on it. In the meantime, this is an area in which we could use prayers – for patience, gentleness, and sleep.

We’ve been able to do school every day, which has been really encouraging to me. We’re figuring out what works and what doesn’t. Being intentional about getting out some good toys for the littles makes a huge difference. Often times, trying to do everything in the morning does not work; but neither does saving the most intense stuff for the afternoon. We need to start with math right away and get through it before we move on to anything else. And while the bigs are doing math, I can often read to the littles and get in a little bit of quality time with them before I need to devote my focus to the bigs again. Once math is wrapped up, I give all the kids a little bit of time to play. Then we do Language Arts and “reading school” – Bible, history, geography, and the girls reading out loud. If everyone’s stamina is holding up, we can sometimes get in science, too, but it often works better to leave that for after the littles’ naps. We’re making our way through the curriculum at a pretty good pace, and while I would have loved to have gotten more done before we went to China, I’m generally pretty happy with where we’re at right now and how we’re able to move through it even with everyone home.

science experiment time!
science experiment time!

I’m working on the balancing act of my own household responsibilities and investing in the kiddos beyond school time. Miranda really enjoys games like Backgammon and “the dice game,” a simplified version of Yahtzee that she’d been playing with my dad. Madeleine CaiQun loves reading and snuggling. Both littles are very into almost anything I’ll do with them – building towers and toppling them and snuggling and reading together. Everyone loves it when we pretend they are airplanes and I fly them around. I’m trying to make time for those things.

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At the same time, though, I need to pay bills and keep up with dishes and laundry. Friends from church had been bringing dinners for us a few times a week through last week, which was so helpful, but I’m now back to planning and preparing all of our food. I’m incredibly thankful for all of the meals I prepared and froze last summer and fall – those are going to sustain us through much of this semester, I expect. Matt has also been helping out with all of the necessary household stuff in the evenings.

And in the midst of it all, we’re tackling appointments and evaluations. In the space of 11 days, we’ve had or will have 11 different appointments, procedures, or evaluations – not all for FangFang but many of them for her.

The big girls are convinced that while we're waiting for PT to start, they should be helping FangFang learn to crawl.
The big girls are convinced that while we’re waiting for PT to start, they should be helping FangFang learn to crawl.

I’ve also spent hours filling out paperwork and talking with intake coordinators for various programs and checking items off of our running to-do list with the nurse at our pediatrician’s office. Friends have been kind enough to help out with our kiddos, which I so appreciate, so that I’m not dragging 4 kids with me to every single appointment or procedure. A pretty quick x-ray appointment? We all go. It’s just part of life. However, today’s CT scan for which sedation is required and I need to be able to focus on a 3-year-old who derives major comfort from food and is not allowed to eat for hours before the procedure and whose sedation recovery I’ve never experienced before? I’d like to tackle that one without another 3 kids in tow, thankyouverymuch!

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with all 4 kiddos in the x-ray waiting room

I did leave the house by myself with all 4 kids multiple times last week, an accomplishment of which I was immensely proud! It requires a little bit of planning, but it feels pretty manageable, so I’m thankful for that.

I don’t feel like we’re in any sort of normal rhythm yet. I think we’re tackling everything we need to do in order to move toward that, though, and I have hope that we’ll get there. Of course, we may get there just in time for the end of Matt’s semester, which changes everything again, or for a femur rodding surgery, which will change everything, too, or – please, no! – a femur fracture, which would also change everything, but we’ll work through all of that as it happens. We just keep moving forward, taking one step at a time, and moving toward the goals we hope to reach.