So much of parenting is getting frustrated, making mistakes, wishing we had done things differently. But sometimes we get it right. And we hope that those are the moments our kids carry forward with them.
Sometimes, when your kids blow it, you’re able to sit with them, holding them while they talk through the antecedents to their behaviors and what they were feeling in the moment. You’re able to talk about upstairs brains and downstairs brains and how being in our downstairs brains doesn’t make us bad, unlovable people. You’re able to hear the sadness and shame, and you’re able to offer reassurance of love and relationship and care, no matter what.
And then you’re able to empower your kiddo to be part of the solution, repairing the damage they caused.
We got it right today. We won’t always. But I’m thankful for these moments when they happen, and I yearn for more of them – more instances of love, connection, relationships mattering more than things, and helping our kids to grow into the honest, feeling, empathetic, resilient, and restorative people we know they can be.